hey quick q where do i buy executive function

hello yes

all the people i’ve seen do this spongebob meme

in PeRfEcTlY aLtErNaTiNg CaPs AnD lOwErCaSe instead of RAnDom SHiT?

they’re all homestucks

if u ever wondered what the bestwin @grayarothane and i talk about in texts, wonder no more. here it is

hello motherfuckers i’m coming back from inactivity to liveblog the eurovision finale which i learned 10 minutes ago is actually tonight

so i remembered this plush i saw on twitter a while back that says “skin… skin…” when u press it. i find it cute so i told a friend about it (hi @polestardean) and she said it was creepy??

by association i thought of lil cal (the creepiest fucking thing) and here they are, strifing

bonus: the friend’s reaction to my question,

college gothic: severe burnout edition

you decide to take care of yourself and to stop using chunks of Mental Health Time to study instead. your days begin to shrink uncontrollably, from 24 hours to 20 to 15 to 10, until you have no other choice.
‘i’m not going to give this my full energy, it’s only 15% of my grade,’ you tell yourself. three days later you’re in agony as the assignment looms over you, demanding you make it better. it won’t let you go.
‘i just want one more day to my week-end,’ you sob pitifully as you eat your instant noodles. that day never comes. your week-ends remain terribly short, monday finds you exhausted still, and you’re not sure how much longer you can carry on like this. you’d rather not think about it.
you skip a one-hour class to study more. four hours later you find yourself cursed, deep in the recesses of youtube, having accomplished less than you would have if you’d attended.
‘maybe i could order a pizza to get a good meal tonight,’ you say to yourself. your phone turns into a mass of writhing snakes before you can grab it. you eat an entire box of dry cereal instead.
the one-week break begins tomorrow, a saturday. you sigh in contentment, blink, and find yourself in your 8am class the monday after. you don’t know how that happened. you’re not sure you want to know.
you’ve been top of the class all through college. it doesn’t seem real. you graduate. it doesn’t seem real either. you receive your diploma and pin it on the wall. it disappears instantly. your memories of college are dim and hazy. it doesn’t seem real. ‘what was it all for again?’ you ask. no one answers.

how do you prevent wild pokémon from calling for help… it ruins the fun out of trying to catch them i’m not here to battle fuck’s sake

when i was smol i wrote a cool story about a sheep and the mosquito that stung him

the sheep was like “are you kidding me??” and then the mosquito was like “don’t worry!! it’ll be gone soon enough” (but in French bc i didn’t speak English back then. i didn’t really speak English until my late teens)

i wish i had kept that kind of creativity. not only is it fucking cute but also it’s hilarious?? just thinking about it now i’m deceased like… “don’t worry it’ll be gone soon enough!!” jhrejhtjrehtrehj

how to kill me in three words: heir of grief