I want Dirk to work at a cheesy Texas-themed restaurant with a gift shop that sells belt buckles emblazoned with the texas flag and shot glasses with cheesy quotes on them and I want him to hate his job so much as he’s forced to wear a cowboy hat and normal shades because his boss won’t let him wear his normal ones
John and all his friends come in and Dirk seriously considers quitting right then and there.
Jade orders the big challenge plate, where you have to eat a 72 oz steak in an hour and she’s done in 25 minutes and gets her picture taken. Dave buys a shirt that says “I’m ready to kick some Tex-ASS” and refuses to take it off meanwhile John has somehow climbed on top of the two-story giant cow outside of the restaurant and Rose is taking pictures of him from the ground.
homestuck but the entire thing is written in the fashion of greentexts
#this is such a terrible idea #like #no #nonononononononono
>april 13, 2009. >be 13. >fuck around my house for several minutes and pm friends. >notice that the flag on the mailbox is raised. >”that must be the beta. wow i can’t wait to play it with my friends.” >unwrap that shit and run the game. >mfw a fucking meteor immediately heads straight towards my house.
queerhomestuck 